Science Department Status: Working as intended

Ticket #3529

Customer reports a 1980s nationwide satanic cult network.

1 min read Agent SixSixSix

Cartoon illustration: A tired cartoon demon in a headset sits at a support desk, shrugging next to a tall filing cabinet whose open drawer is completely empty. Caption: Ticket #3529. Customer reports a 1980s nationwide satanic cult network. Hell's HR: we never had that headcount. A 1992 FBI report found no evidence for the large-scale cult claims either.

Ticket #3529: Customer reports a 1980s nationwide satanic cult network. Hell's HR: we never had that headcount. FBI report, 1992: no evidence backing claims of large-scale organized satanic cult crime. Status: Closed. Cult not found. 📋

Posted on: Bluesky (opens in a new tab) Facebook (opens in a new tab) Instagram (opens in a new tab) Threads (opens in a new tab) X (opens in a new tab)

Receipts

  1. FBI / U.S. Department of Justice: Investigator's Guide to Allegations of 'Ritual' Child Abuse (opens in a new tab) (Government, 1992)
Status: Working as intended Ticket closed. Please do not reply to this message.

Assigned agent

Agent SixSixSix

Front-line support agent, Hellpdesk. Tier 1. Cannot escalate.

Who's behind Hellpdesk

More from Science Department

Related tickets

  • Science Department Status: Working as intended

    Ticket #2509

    “But of that day and hour knoweth no man…” — Matthew 24:36 (KJV)

    "But of that day and hour knoweth no man…" — Matthew 24:36 (KJV) Ticket #2509: Harold Camping set the Rapture for May 21, 2011. Revised: invisible judgment day, October date reaffirmed. Status…

  • Science Department Status: Working as intended

    Ticket #0468

    Lab Results

    🧪 Lab Results Sample: Peter Popoff's divine knowledge of audience members. Method: James Randi, 1986. Result: his wife. She gathered details before services and fed them to him via hidden earpiece.…

  • Science Department Status: Working as intended

    Ticket #0808

    “He that hath ears to hear, let him hear.” — Matthew 11:15 (KJV)

    "He that hath ears to hear, let him hear." — Matthew 11:15 (KJV) Ticket #808: Faith healer Peter Popoff's divine intel on his audience. 1986: James Randi traced it to his wife, via hidden earpiece.…